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weekly-roundup

Oil Craters 7%, S&P Erases War Losses — The Market Is Betting on a Deal It Doesn't Have Yet

The S&P erased all war losses in a week. Oil fell 7% on peace vibes. Then talks collapsed and the Navy blockaded the Strait of Hormuz. Normal week.

Apr 14, 20261 min read

WFCJPMGSORCL

weekly-roundup

Hormuz Blockade, $127 Oil, and the S&P 500 Just... Goes Up — This Week Was Unhinged

The Strait of Hormuz is blockaded, 13M barrels/day are offline, Qatar's LNG took a hit — and the S&P 500 finished the week up. We have questions.

Apr 14, 20261 min read

SNDKDELLHPEORCL

weekly-roundup

The Strait of Hormuz Is Breaking Everything: Oil, Food, Banks, and Your $7 Bag of Doritos

Oil hit $127, peace talks failed, CPI came in hot, and Intel somehow ripped 24%. Your weekly social sentiment debrief, no filter.

Apr 13, 20261 min read

INTCPLTRUNHPEP

weekly-roundup

Intel Rips 24%, PLTR Pukes 14%, and the Strait of Hormuz Is Running Everyone's Week

INTC moonshots 24%, PLTR craters 14%, gas is up $1.17/gallon, and the Strait of Hormuz is still basically a parking lot. Normal week.

Apr 12, 20261 min read

INTCPLTRCRWVUNH

weekly-roundup

Hardware Eats Software, Intel Rips 24%, and the Strait of Hormuz Is Now a Macro Variable — Weekly Roundup

INTC ripped 24%, PLTR cratered 14%, and oil nearly hit $100. Oh, and the Strait of Hormuz became the world's most important shipping bottleneck. Just a normal week.

Apr 11, 20261 min read

INTCPLTRCRWVUNH

weekly-roundup

Seven-Day Win Streak, A Ceasefire, and Hardware Eating Software Alive — Here's Your Weekly Recap

A US-Iran ceasefire, a 7-day S&P win streak, and hardware stocks absolutely murdering enterprise software. Welcome to the week that was.

Apr 10, 20261 min read

CRWVINTCLEVIMETA

weekly-roundup

Ceasefire Euphoria Sends Dow Up 1,325 Points — But 800 Ships Are Still Stuck in the Strait

Dow +1,325. Oil's biggest drop in 6 years. And 800+ ships still anchored outside the Strait of Hormuz. This week had everything.

Apr 9, 20261 min read

SHWCATHDGS

weekly-roundup

Iran, Oil at $113, and a Market That Can't Decide If It's Scared: Your Weekly Chaos Recap

Trump's Iran ultimatum, $113 oil, and a narrow market bounce masked some genuinely interesting under-the-hood moves. Here's what actually mattered.

Apr 8, 20261 min read

UNHHUMCVSSTX

weekly-roundup

Hormuz Is Closed, Oil Is $113, and Somehow the S&P Is Only Down 5% — Here's Why

Iran closed the Strait of Hormuz, oil hit $113, and the S&P barely flinched. Either markets are brave or in denial — probably both.

Apr 7, 20261 min read

STXWDCAPPDVN

weekly-roundup

Iran Broke the Market's Brain This Week — Here's What the Data Actually Says

Crude surged 12%, credit markets flashed red, and the internet collectively lost its mind over Iran. The S&P 500 shrugged. Here's your weekly debrief.

Apr 6, 20261 min read

SPYQQQTSLAAMD

weekly-roundup

Oil at $140, a Pilot MIA, and Your Easter Candy Is Getting Cheaper — Welcome to the Weirdest Week in Markets

Brent crude above $140, a missing US airman, 178K jobs nobody agrees on, and Nike hitting 2014 lows. The market had a week. We need a drink.

Apr 5, 20261 min read

NKETSLAJPMGS

weekly-roundup

Oil at $140, SpaceX at $2T, and Trump's Iran Speech Broke the Market — Your Week in Chaos

Oil hit $140, SpaceX filed at a $2T valuation, Tesla missed deliveries, and Trump's primetime speech tanked futures in real time. Normal week.

Apr 3, 20261 min read

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