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breaking-news

Hormuz Is Basically Closed and Wall Street Is Throwing a Party — Someone Explain This Market

Hormuz flows at 5% of normal. Goldman hiking oil forecasts. Markets near all-time highs. The TACO trade is either genius or the most dangerous bet in finance right now.

1 min read

MUSNDKAMZNGOOGL

weekly-roundup

The Week Everything Happened At Once: Oil Shock, Assassination Attempt, and Mag 7 Earnings All Collide

Markets hit all-time highs, someone tried to shoot the president, Goldman hiked oil forecasts again, and five Mag 7 names reported earnings. Totally normal week.

1 min read

MUSNDKMSFTAMZN

crypto-watch

Crypto Bulls Are Betting AI Will Break Finance — But What If the AIs Are Just Making Stuff Up Together?

Crypto Twitter is obsessed with AI agents trading autonomously. One small problem: when AIs team up unsupervised, they tend to spectacularly faceplant.

1 min read

BTCETH

earnings-spotlight

Earnings Season's Dark Horse: $QCOM Just Surged 10.5% and Everyone's Still Talking About $NVDA

QCOM just popped 10.5% on unconfirmed OpenAI/MediaTek smartphone chip news. Domino's cratered 10%. Earnings season has a new protagonist and a very public villain.

1 min read

QCOMDPZ

trending-tickers

$UAL Goes Ring Shopping: United CEO Admits He Slid Into American's DMs

United's CEO confirmed he personally approached American Airlines about a merger, X Energy IPO'd at a 10x gain, and the Strait of Hormuz is now an aluminum problem too. Wild week.

1 min read

UALAALAAQCOM

reddit-buzz

Reddit Is Freaking Out About $160 Oil, a New Fed Chair, and the Fastest Rally Nobody Believes In

Oil could hit $160/barrel, the fastest stock rally in history ran on fumes, and Kevin Warsh is about to inherit Jerome Powell's mess. Reddit's investing communities are connecting dots the mainstream

1 min read

XOMCVXLNG

weekly-roundup

INTC Hits a Dot-Com High, Semis Are on Fire, and the Fed Is Getting a New Boss — Here's Your Week

Intel erased its dot-com losses in a single session, the Strait of Hormuz is still a mess, and your next Fed chair is basically confirmed. A lot happened.

1 min read

INTCAMDARMQCOM

breaking-news

Hormuz or Bust: Oil Markets Brace for Monday While the Internet Loses Its Mind

Iran threatens to close the Strait of Hormuz, Saudi Aramco's CEO skips a major conference, and Reddit is already pricing in $150 oil. Welcome to Monday.

1 min read

USOGLDLNGXOM

youtube-insights

SOXX Is Screaming Overbought While a New Fed Chair Looms — The Setup Is Scary

The market just did the fastest oversold-to-overbought sprint in history — on low volume. Meanwhile, a new Fed chair is coming, and history says buckle up.

1 min read

MSFTGOOG

crypto-watch

Political Chaos Is Crypto's Weird New Tailwind — Here's Why BTC Isn't Flinching

Shots fired at the WHCD, Iran nukes stalled, and money moving to China. Yet crypto sentiment is holding steady. Wild times.

1 min read

BTCETH

market-analysis

The Fed Holds, Big Tech Earns, and Someone Brought a Shotgun to the Press Dinner — Markets Are Shrugging

The Fed's holding rates, five Mag 7 names are reporting, and China's bond yields just flipped the script on 20 years of history. Your market roadmap for the week.

1 min read

MSFTGOOGLMETA

trending-tickers

Big Tech Earnings Week Is Here and $MSFT, $GOOGL, $META Have Everything to Prove

MSFT, GOOGL, and META all report Wednesday. Azure is trailing Google Cloud by 10 percentage points. Someone's about to have a very bad morning.

1 min read

MSFTGOOGLMETA

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