Tesla's Quarter Was So Good It Made the Bears Cry Into Their Short Positions
Tesla obliterates estimates, Texas Instruments surges, and markets rally despite Iran tensions — earnings season is carrying this economy on its back
Ticker Ratings
| Ticker | Rating | Entry Price | Current | $ Gain | % Gain |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| TSLA Tesla, Inc. | buy | $386.39 | — | — | — |
| TXN TEXAS INSTRUMENTS INC | buy | $262.58 | — | — | — |
| IBM INTERNATIONAL BUSINESS MACHINES CORP | hold | $234.04 | — | — | — |
| RIVN Rivian Automotive, Inc. / DE | hold | $17.76 | — | — | — |
| UAL United Airlines Holdings, Inc. | hold | $91.30 | — | — | — |
| MSTR Strategy Inc | buy | $177.70 | — | — | — |
| BTC Grayscale Bitcoin Mini Trust ETF | buy | $77747.00 | — | — | — |
Let's start with the elephant in the room wearing a robotaxi: $TSLA just delivered one of those quarters that makes you wonder if the bears were even watching. Adjusted EPS of $0.41 vs. $0.34 expected, gross margins of 21.1% vs. 17.7% estimated, and free cash flow that swung from an expected negative $1.86 billion to a positive $1.44 billion. That's not a beat, that's a full-on ambush. Robotaxi launches in Dallas and Houston are skipping the safety driver phase, Optimus production lines are being installed at Fremont, and FSD just got approved in the Netherlands. Europe, say hello.
Meanwhile, $TXN surged roughly 9% after hours on a Q2 revenue forecast of $5.0–$5.4 billion fueled by industrial and data center demand — the kind of number that makes the whole semiconductor sector do a little shimmy. $IBM fell roughly 5.9% despite beating revenue estimates, because apparently Wall Street is haunted by AI disruption fears even when the numbers are fine. And $NOW beat-and-raised but still dropped on margin guidance of 31.5% vs. prior 32% — one of those 'no good deed goes unpunished' situations.
Oh, and the Strait of Hormuz is technically in a standoff, gas prices are spiking, and the Dow still rose over 350 points on the day. Earnings season is built different — it will not be stopped by geopolitics, gravity, or common sense.